George Carlin Quotes and Sayings

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George Carlin Quotes and Sayings, best, wise

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

George Carlin

Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that.

George Carlin

George Carlin Quotes and Sayings, brainy, famous

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me – they’re cramming for their final exam.

George Carlin

If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.

George Carlin

People who say they don’t care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don’t care what people think.

George Carlin

George Carlin Quotes and Sayings, meaningful, wise

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don’t have as many people who believe it.

George Carlin

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

George Carlin

George Carlin Quotes and Sayings, positive, meaningful

Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?

George Carlin